Walt's Corner

According to my report from Honeywell, our air conditioner had to run 11 hours more in the month of May than last year. System is 17 years old now, plus the average temps were 1 degree higher than last year. Our system struggles to maintain 74º during these hot triple digit days.

While Doppler Dave says we’ve had 6 triple digit days this year, Doppler Walt calls bullshit. Doppler Walt says we started hitting triple digits the last week in May and have hit them almost every day in June.

Time for a new HVAC system? Might as well do it before it has a chance to break down forcing us to go a week or two without AC.

Like every May/June timeframe here in the wonderful desert southwest, the temperatures are soaring more than plummeting. Yesterday’s high reached 110F here at Casa Basil with a relative humidity of 1%. Doppler Dave tried to look me in the eye during the 4:30 newscast and tell me the high was 105. Bull shit Doppler. Perhaps in the official temperature white box at the airport. But out here in the outlying areas of the city, that swing is much greater. The picture above shows 107. When I took the picture. But check out the little numbers under it. the low/high of the day. 75 and 110. And this is on my back patio. In the shade.

For example, right now as I write this at 0456, Doppler Dave’s team is reporting it has cooled down to 86F. But out here? Currently 78F with my weather station claiming it has in fact dipped down to a low 75 overnight.

June is traditionally the hottest month of the year for us – as in the month with the most triple digit temperatures. Honestly though, out here in the outskirts, we’ve already hit triple digits by the end of May and continue through September. Which is why heading up into the Lincoln National Forest to camp for the weekends are especially refreshing this time of year. The lows are still dipping into the 40s and highs are 60s. Can’t wait to head up there!

Guess I’ll start working on fixing that fresh water tank bracket on the RV.

Memorial Day weekend. Carol needs to get her car inspected for the new tags. She goes to her usual spot on our corner of Montana – Lube Express. She gets her oil changed there as well. Why? I have no clue. It’s not like I won’t change it. Maybe she trusts Lube Express more than me? Perhaps I should revisit our relationship.

I have always been leery of Jiffy Lubes and the like. They give you a cheap oil change and hope to get a bigger sell out of you when they try to tell you your engine is blown and they can fix it for $1000. Flash back to my first job at a full service gas station where I was told that when I add air to the customers’ tires and see a puff of dust come from the wheels, to inform the customers that they should get their brakes serviced. And guess who just happened to services brakes? Yeah. That guy was a crook.

Carol told them she needed an inspection, oil changed, and top off all the fluids. One time, I did have them change my oil. And cabin filter, because, that’s a real bitch to get to. And there they were, showing me my filthy-ass cabin filter I was thinking about replacing. I also witnessed them tightened up my exhaust manifold bolts which I also was thinking about hitting but didn’t say anything to them. So I thought to myself, wow, these guys really are cool. Maybe they aren’t all bad.

Inspection performed and oil changed, the lady told Carol she had checked her coolant and it was bad. Caked up. Smelled bad. Could be from a blown head gasket. Carol told her that they had just replaced it last year. She asked her to just top it off. The lady refused to top it off since it needed replacing. Carol asked if they had aired up the tires too. The lady told her that they had aired them up. They did not air them up. The tire pressure was all over the place. They didn’t touch them. She was mad.

Just after her experience, she received one of those emails asking for a review of her experience. And she let them have it. So much so, that on the June 4th, the regional manager called her up to get more information about her experience. He couldn’t believe what he was reading. Or Hearing. He asked her to go to any other Lube Express of her choice, free of charge, so they could inspect and top off all the fluids. They wanted to make it right.

Carol went to the Zaragoza Lube Express and they checked everything out. Including the coolant. Nothing was wrong. It was low, but in good condition. With the regional manager on speakerphone after that, he asked Carol about what the original lady had told her because he couldn’t really hear it well from their video recording of the event, which they were tracking. No they didn’t check her fluids. No they didn’t check her tires. Did that lady really tell her that it could be from a blown head gasket? Carol confirmed. She also told him the she is old enough and has been poor enough to know what a blown head gasket feels and smells like. And that wasn’t it.

Kudos to Lube Express for making it right. Guess there are still some good people left in the business.

The next 10 pounds of coffee arrived from my supplier. The last batch was a peaberry. It was good, but sold out. Decided to go with Tom’s new blend called 10 Speed Blend.

Peaberries are unlike regular coffee beans, which are two halves of a whole. Peaberries are a whole and shaped a bit differently. This new batch of coffee is a blend Tom designed to be versatile. In his words, “It works great in all gears.” Also picked up that old diner-style coffee mug with the 10 Speed logo on it. He draws all his own artwork.

Peaberry is the bottom bean. Rounder than most beans that are two halves, and flatter.

Roasted the first batch of 10 Speed over the weekend. Currently drinking my last pound of the peaberry but will probably dig into the new one over the weekend. Smells great.

TMI? If talk about hemorrhoids and colonoscopies is something that bothers you, you may want to skip this one folks. But if it peaks (?!) your curiosity, read on, Wayne!

Like Joe Walsh, Life’s been good to me so far! I’ve managed to reach age 55 without having to endure a colonoscopy. For the last 10 years my primary care doctor has been on my ass about getting the procedure. Um. NO. At the time I believe the recommended age was 50.

Or. 

I could use something like Cologuard. 

Easy choice. No choice really. Let me shit in an envelope and mail it to you!

Every year – pass!

Until this year. Ooopsie!

My doctor almost couldn’t contain her pleasure while telling me my yearly shit-test came back positive for blood and that I would, in fact, have to (should) get the colonoscopy she had been trying to get me into for the last 10 years.  You know what? I do have hemorrhoids. That could explain the blood in my stool sample. Her and my gastroenterologist agreed that could be the most likely cause. But did I want to bet the farm on that? No. So I reluctantly agreed to go through this horrendous procedure that I’d been able to avoid thus far.

We hear all types of horror stories about how bad the VA is, but honestly, for me, I have had nothing but the best of experiences. VA has always been there for me. Whenever I needed something, VA has provided. Have there been scandals? Sure. Did it turn out that my first doctor VA doctor probably took too much pleasure from juggling my balls like she was looking for ripe tomatoes all in the name of healthcare? Probably. At the time I remember thinking man, this lady is thorough! But she was fired. 

I knew going in that the preparation was the worst part. I knew I wouldn’t mind the actual procedure – that I would be out and none the wiser. It was the going the week prior without any red meat that was the worst. Especially when a new kamado grill arrived and I had to grill chicken on it as its inaugural cook for fuck’s sake. That, coupled with no whole grains meant chicken tacos without rice on Taco Tuesday.

The next big part was coming off my naproxen prescription Wednesday night. It’s a blood thinner and wouldn’t mix well with any removal of polyps if necessary. Luckily I could continue taking my gabapentin for nerve pain.

Next was the liquid diet that began Sunday morning. I poured water into the jug (about 4.5 liters) of what would start off as a mildly acceptable tasting liquid and end as Satan himself at 0400 Monday morning. I don’t even mind having to shit my brains out. I’ve done that plenty of times. Having to drink all that nasty fluid without projectile vomiting it into the next county is the worst part. So 4AM, Monday morning, the worst part is over. I’m pissing from 2 holes. The best part is to come – meeting the Dream Master, I mean, anesthesiologist.

This is where we meat back up with nothing but great experiences with my VA. This procedure was no different. All top scores from me. Reporting time was 0830. We stepped into the office at 0824. Within 4 minutes, I was already in the ass-opened robe, plugged into an IV, and waiting. Shortly thereafter I was visited by my doctor who informed that two veterans were in front of me and that if all went as planned with them, I should be in the room in a little over an hour.

Everything must have gone as planned because at 1040 they put the mask on me, had me roll onto my left shoulder, and gave me a pillow to hug like TimTim my first teddy bear. A thunderous clack and vibration reminiscent of a roller coaster catching on track and being hauled up the initial ascent, I was being whisked out of the staging/recovery room and down the hall. The temperature dropped noticeably as we entered the room. My bed came to an abrupt stop. Reciting my full name, birthday, and last four, the wonder drugs were administered. I looked at the wall to the clock as I slowly faded out of consciousness. 1045…

Not even a half hour later I was awake. Procedure done. Two small (2mm) polyps removed. Doctor told me I wouldn’t need another colonoscopy for 7 years! Woo-hoo! I’ll be retired then! I was released around 1230. Told not drive or sign any important papers for 24 hours.

Many thanks to Carol for providing me my transportation to and from. We stopped at Whataburger on the way home. This won’t be published until Wednesday, but as I write this on a Taco Tuesday, I can tell you that we’ll be having fajitas tonight instead. I’ve got a skirt steak and chicken breast marinading since this morning. Not in the same bag, you sicko. I made some salsa verde. It will be epic!